My mental escape

In the past when I feel like I need to release frustration and i have no one to go to at the time I have resorted to writing my thoughts down.

So I guess that's why I am here.

That and I have no privacy to have a decent phone conversation with someone that I trust.

So I'm moving out of my current living situation in less then 2 weeks and moving into a 2 bedroom with my current roommate. Literally roommate. I currently live in housing that is provided by my work - the trade off - a roommate and no personal space literally.

This is not what my vision of post university life looked like. Moving to a larger city was suppose to be exciting and my social life was suppose to be more active. Of course I have friends in the city - however none are close.

Instead, I'm sitting on my bed waiting for the night to be over b/c at least tomorrow I will have something more to do.

Of course a great deal of this stress has economics at its center. 1. money will be tight once we move into this new place 2. it was difficult to find a good clean, safe apartment that fits into our budgets 3. S has now decided that she is not spending anything b/c she is worried about having enough 4. I talked her into going to hot docs tonight not knowing how stressed she is 5. she is now moody and non-talkative 6. we have to sit in the same room b/c there is no where for either of us to go and have some space away from each other 7. the constant reminders around us of how we make less then minimum wage and the stress of knowing that good work does not pay off financially.

Having our time, age, and good will taken advantage of is enraging - and writing all of these points out is not making me feel better. There need to be some changes and I'm not sure how to make them.